It's amazing how quickly a year goes by, but that's not a surprise to anyone is it? I have had so many amazing experiences during these last 12 months. I feel I've grown more as a person and learned more about the world than I had in the preceding decades. I have done an awful job, however, at keeping a blog. I meant to write each time I visited a new place, or about all the little occurrences that have substantially impacted me but I suppose I'm too busy keeping busy (and I also write each entry laboriously). I am writing a personal journal to preserve these things for myself but it is filled with details and incoherent ramblings that are not fit for the general public (or anyone who happens to "Google" me online). I wish I had an ability to sum up exactly what this year has meant for me, but words are not enough.
I have been incredibly pleased to actually SEE several friends from home during these past months (in chronological order):
Justin Eddy - who visited me for (at least a week?) on Lesvos in Greece - the most beautiful and peaceful place I've ever been.
Mike Leonhardt - who went on a European adventure with me to Athens and around Greece, Rome, Prague and Amsterdam.
Jeni Peters - who just so happened to be in Rome at the same time I was going to be in Rome!
Michelle Smith - whose interests in arms reduction and Russia brought her to me in Moscow.
Before that it was 9 long months of new places and new faces which was terrific but seeing familiar faces allows me to reconnect with the past and evaluate the changes in myself. Another thing that has really allowed me to see this has been my stay in Russia for the past couple of weeks.
Russia was the first place I ever travelled to outside of North America. It was the first time I had to navigate in a different language and culture. Granted, for that trip I was with the Havighurst Center of Miami University on a summer course and actually had to do very little for myself. When left to my own devices I mostly clung to experienced travelers like Stephen Solomon (my peer mentor), professors and Russian tourist guides. Nonetheless, Russia terrified me. I couldn't understand anything - Cyrillic gave me an instant headache, all the words blended together, people were so MEAN, always looking at me like I was some sort of crazy person/confused American girl.
I have a distinct memory of being mocked on on overnight train from St. Petersburg to Moscow for breaking out in loud Nona-laughs. It was my birthday, for goodness sake and I was happy and had been drinking a lot of Sovetskoye Shampanskoye (and yes, I know I was being made fun of because the Russian speakers told me so). My critic, a middle-aged, brassy-blonde Russian woman proceeded to get staggeringly drunk, then dance and vulgarly grope a man half her age. But, really, it's Russia and laughing loudly is far less acceptable than complete inebriation and public displays of dry-humping... so I guess I was asking to be ridiculed. This was 5 years ago now, in the summer of 2005. At the end of my month in Russia I wanted nothing more than to leave. I was tired - of not being understood of feeling like a freak, of the sound of this hard-sounding incomprehensible language everywhere I went, of dill (oh, how I hated dill, apparently the only herb used in Russian cuisine).
At present, I have gone 12 times as long without being in an English-speaking country and these things have ceased to faze me. Now, I have visited 11 countries (once again, in chronological order):
Russia (Moscow, St. Petersburg, Veliky Novgorod)
Hungary (Budapest, various small towns)
Spain (Barcelona)
Austria (Vienna)
Serbia (Belgrade)
Greece (Lesvos, Athens, Volos)
Italy (Rome)
Czech Republic (Prague)
Netherlands (Amsterdam)
Poland (Krakow, Warsaw, small towns)
Ukraine (Lviv, Kiev)
It helps that most places I've been are relatively "English-friendly" including bus-drivers in rural Poland. I am also incredibly thankful for CouchSurfing and friends that have acted as de facto translators - especially in Serbia, Ukraine and Russia. I have also learned some important survival skills. I am comfortable now getting the things I need without (or with very few) words. I have grown to appreciate the fact that I can't understand advertisements or people's inane conversations on public transportation. I have no problem understanding non-native speakers. Perhaps these things sound trivial, but they feel substantial.
My second trip to Russia has been so much less painful and less disorienting than the first. In Hungary, I mastered the art of not-smiling-to-yourself and always find this composure useful in post-communist countries. I don't know Russian, but I know enough to mind my Ps and Qs and I know that smiling broadly is not the best way to receive assistance. I also learned the sounds the letters of Cyrillic alphabet make so I can at least sound out words (subsequentially mispronouncing them) and read the metro stops. There are even some cognates once you can understand the letters! By my appearance it is still immediately obvious that I am a foreigner. I no longer have the curly blonde hair but my short haircut and lack of stiletto heels is telling. It doesn't help that the only clothes I have that are acceptable for the cool fall weather are t-shirts, a pair of men's jeans and hiking boots (my farm-working wardrobe) but I get by. I have even come to peace with the food. I must admit I feel quite decadent eating shrimp and smoked salmon and caviar and fake crab and halva everyday. And the mayonnaise! There is something wrong with most the mayonaise in Europe. It's sweet, almost like Miracle Whip, but in Russia they understand mayonnaise and I love mayonnaise.
In a few days I will be leaving Russia. My expensive visa will be up and studies start in Manchester soon. I will be traveling through the capitals of the Baltic states for a week and then flying to the UK. I am both nervous and excited. I have grown a bit weary of homelessness and living out of a bag. Familiar MESPOM faces will be welcome. I am not looking forward to the high cost of living in the UK and I wonder what it will be like to be surrounded by English again. I am excited for a plethora of good shows to attend and access to "ethnic" foods and hippie foods like seitan and tempeh and cheap tofu. I intend to update soon, but don't hold your breath.
I miss and love you all. Please keep in touch.
