And already, it's over

Now that I'm graduating I thought I'd make a contribution to my sad-excuse for a blog to update people on where I'm at now, in case anyone is wondering.

The past 22 months have absolutely flown by. In August 2009,  two years abroad seemed like forever and now it's over. Think about the last two years - they went really fast, huh?  Anyway, I graduated today (an odd day of the week) with a Master's degree in Environmental Science, Policy and Management, or MESPOM. It's quite a wordy degree title I'd say. As part of my course I studied at Central European University (Budapest, Hungary), University of the Aegean (Lesvos, Greece) and the University of Manchester (Manchester, England). I did learn some science and management, but I mostly learned about policy, which is natural I suppose, since that's what I came into this with and what drew me to Hungary in the first place. 

I wrote my thesis about...well, I started to explain but you probably don't care. It's the boring part of my life that has been based in academia.  If you're interested you can see the abstract here. Otherwise I'll just say it is about agriculture and Poland.

Last summer, I spent a month in Poland WWOOFing, which I wrote about a briefly previously. I loved it and this inspired me to go back to Poland this spring to do research for my thesis. I had an amazing time in Poland during both trips and met the kindest people who took me in, fed me, introduced me to more people... It was so much fun once I got past my initial shyness. I ate so much good food and even a rode horse for the first time which I pretended (to try and intimidate the horse) that I was not afraid of (but I'm told they are very sensitive - it knew).

Between trips to Poland, I lived in Manchester, England and studied at the University of Manchester for about 6 months. I had an amazing time and highly recommend that everyone from Akron, OH visit. It has an Akron feel in a good way, with trains and (lots of) buses. You can even go across the entire country in a single day using only public transport! Also, everyone is British which is an interesting alternate reality of  a post-industrial society. Everyone has health care and people can actually live on unemployment. It's diverse. There's good music and food and people (think: The Smiths, The Fall, Joy Division, Oasis, and more!). Marx and Engels even used to hang out in a great old library there and watch the industrial revolution unfold. 

 My flatmate Raph (left) and Rosie - reflecting on the class struggle. 

Northwest England is the British version of the American Midwest (or vice-versa, rather) and there is something I like about Ohio. My hometown and those around it make every US list of "Worst Places to Find a Job" "Worst Real Estate Values" and other various "worst" indicators of economic progress or general satisfaction that are constantly being ranked by new outlets like aol.com. Ohio loses population every year.  But, this is sort of a good thing. Ohioans may not have much but we've worked for what we have and it breeds good art, good values, good people. Much more of my identity feels Midwestern than my more general descriptor of American - especially when compared to the majority of Americans around me that are from the Coasts. 

Maybe, I just got really lucky in England. The internet blessed me with the world's best roommate, Raphaela who sat in the living room with me making things while I studied and we chatted, listened to music and alternated cooking responsibilities. There was a cat and a basil plant. Basically, domestic bliss. Through Raph I met loads of smart, interesting people. Suffice it to say that I loved living in Manchester and very well may do it again. 

So in the past year it's been Poland, Moscow, England, Poland from July 2010-March 2011 with some interludes in Ukraine, the Baltic States, Turkey, Hungary and even the USA. Then I went to Moscow (again) in April and wrote most of my thesis. I found Moscow exactly as I left it and it was a very exciting time for me as I sat inside a weirdly wallpapered twelfth-story one-room apartment all day at a computer reading and writing and driving myself mildy insane. 

On the rare occasion that I socialized people were sort of confused as to what I was doing there. I'm sort of confused as well.  I don't speak Russian and I wasn't even doing any tourist activities since I've already been to Moscow twice,  exhausting the activities for non-Russian speakers. This actually made it an ideal place to write - I didn't know anyone, and it's too expensive to eat and drink out when a week's worth of cabbage and vodka can be acquired for $5 at the shop with only one human encounter. This encounter requires no actual words since no one in Moscow says polite words and those are the only words I know. This strategy can be roughly used in any country in Europe. 

All that is in involved is shaking my head and muttering an "n" sound when addressed about whether or not I'm purchasing plastic bags (I always bring a reusable bag - of course). Then I  hand over some roubles after a price has been announced (but which can be read off the cash register, thus requiring no language skills). I found speaking very little Polish in Poland harder than speaking very little Russian in Moscow because Polish people say a lot more pleasantries and generally speak to one another. In Moscow I've found it better to just interact wordlessly and glaringly - just like the woman in the kiosk is interacting with you. If anyone talks to me I basically say "no" or "I don't know" which is both rude and can be said without betraying my nationality which I find to be quite effective. 

When I went back to Russia I went via Kaliningrad. Though surrounded by EU countries it was immediately obvious I had left Europe proper. Can you guess how?

So, despite an amazing trip to Abkhazia (which you can see photos of on my facebook) my re-return to Russia was largely boring and filled with academic endeavours occasionally enhanced by visiting parks and grocery shopping. 

I have now been based back in Budapest for about a month. I finished my thesis and went on a delightful holiday with the wonderful Katharine to Bosnia. It went really well. We rode a train for 12 hours each way, which I actually enjoy. A day train was the only option, which was not ideal but allowed for a beautiful ride. We watched the transition from flat Hungary, to Croatia, through Serbia (enter Cyrillic) to mountainous Bosnia and Sarajevo. It was Katharine's first Couchsurfing experience and I think she is now convinced of how amazing it is (I think Couchsurfing is the best way to travel - especially alone, as I usually am).  Our host Amra was amazing and we decided to stay longer than we'd originally planned. It was a perfect mix of sitting in parks, eating, drinking beer, trying to understand a heart-wrenching history and city wandering. 

One day, we made a special trip to a fish restaurant near Konjic but, of course, couldn't read the menu.  We ended up with pork. And 10 giant pastry rolls. And a bowl of some kind of porridge mush. At least we got the beer right. Katharine was so easy to travel with and it was great to see her one-on-one. 

On Monday I defended my thesis. Now, I'm trying to solve a million logistical tasks and procrastinating. Today I graduated. On Saturday,  I fly from Vienna to Tanzania when I will stay until July 14.

I'm really excited. It will be my first trip outside of Europe and my last trip before I need to get a job and I can't take a holiday every 2 months. Right now, I'm focusing on Tanzania and fun things while ignoring the black hole that my life becomes in mid-July and I will be largely out of touch until then. 

From July 14 I will be in Moscow, again. Also, my Hungarian residency expires so I've got to get out of the EU. I'll stay there for a while looking for jobs, trying not to die of boredom and maybe even trying to meet some people and find nice things in Moscow, which I'm sure do  exist. After that - who knows? I don't and this leaves me both excited and terrified. 

Anniversary of living abroad/Russia: Take 2

Today, September 3, 2010 marks the 1 year anniversary of my getting-the-f**k-OUT-of-Ohio" (asterisks provided for former co-workers and young family members).

It's amazing how quickly a year goes by, but that's not a surprise to anyone is it? I have had so many amazing experiences during these last 12 months. I feel I've grown more as a person and learned more about the world than I had in the preceding decades. I have done an awful job, however, at keeping a blog. I meant to write each time I visited a new place, or about all the little occurrences that have substantially impacted me but I suppose I'm too busy keeping busy (and I also write each entry laboriously). I am writing a personal journal to preserve these things for myself but it is filled with details and incoherent ramblings that are not fit for the general public (or anyone who happens to "Google" me online). I wish I had an ability to sum up exactly what this year has meant for me, but words are not enough.

I have been incredibly pleased to actually SEE several friends from home during these past months (in chronological order):

Justin Eddy - who visited me for (at least a week?) on Lesvos in Greece - the most beautiful and peaceful place I've ever been.
Mike Leonhardt - who went on a European adventure with me to Athens and around Greece, Rome, Prague and Amsterdam.
Jeni Peters - who just so happened to be in Rome at the same time I was going to be in Rome!
Michelle Smith - whose interests in arms reduction and Russia brought her to me in Moscow.


Before that it was 9 long months of new places and new faces which was terrific but seeing familiar faces allows me to reconnect with the past and evaluate the changes in myself. Another thing that has really allowed me to see this has been my stay in Russia for the past couple of weeks.

Russia was the first place I ever travelled to outside of North America. It was the first time I had to navigate in a different language and culture. Granted, for that trip I was with the Havighurst Center of Miami University on a summer course and actually had to do very little for myself. When left to my own devices I mostly clung to experienced travelers like Stephen Solomon (my peer mentor), professors and Russian tourist guides. Nonetheless, Russia terrified me. I couldn't understand anything - Cyrillic gave me an instant headache, all the words blended together, people were so MEAN, always looking at me like I was some sort of crazy person/confused American girl.

I have a distinct memory of being mocked on on overnight train from St. Petersburg to Moscow for breaking out in loud Nona-laughs. It was my birthday, for goodness sake and I was happy and had been drinking a lot of Sovetskoye Shampanskoye (and yes, I know I was being made fun of because the Russian speakers told me so). My critic, a middle-aged, brassy-blonde Russian woman proceeded to get staggeringly drunk, then dance and vulgarly grope a man half her age. But, really, it's Russia and laughing loudly is far less acceptable than complete inebriation and public displays of dry-humping... so I guess I was asking to be ridiculed. This was 5 years ago now, in the summer of 2005. At the end of my month in Russia I wanted nothing more than to leave. I was tired - of not being understood of feeling like a freak, of the sound of this hard-sounding incomprehensible language everywhere I went, of dill (oh, how I hated dill, apparently the only herb used in Russian cuisine).

At present, I have gone 12 times as long without being in an English-speaking country and these things have ceased to faze me. Now, I have visited 11 countries (once again, in chronological order):

Russia (Moscow, St. Petersburg, Veliky Novgorod)
Hungary (Budapest, various small towns)
Spain (Barcelona)
Austria (Vienna)
Serbia (Belgrade)
Greece (Lesvos, Athens, Volos)
Italy (Rome)
Czech Republic (Prague)
Netherlands (Amsterdam)
Poland (Krakow, Warsaw, small towns)
Ukraine (Lviv, Kiev)

It helps that most places I've been are relatively "English-friendly" including bus-drivers in rural Poland. I am also incredibly thankful for CouchSurfing and friends that have acted as de facto translators - especially in Serbia, Ukraine and Russia. I have also learned some important survival skills. I am comfortable now getting the things I need without (or with very few) words. I have grown to appreciate the fact that I can't understand advertisements or people's inane conversations on public transportation. I have no problem understanding non-native speakers. Perhaps these things sound trivial, but they feel substantial.

My second trip to Russia has been so much less painful and less disorienting than the first. In Hungary, I mastered the art of not-smiling-to-yourself and always find this composure useful in post-communist countries. I don't know Russian, but I know enough to mind my Ps and Qs and I know that smiling broadly is not the best way to receive assistance. I also learned the sounds the letters of Cyrillic alphabet make so I can at least sound out words (subsequentially mispronouncing them) and read the metro stops. There are even some cognates once you can understand the letters! By my appearance it is still immediately obvious that I am a foreigner. I no longer have the curly blonde hair but my short haircut and lack of stiletto heels is telling. It doesn't help that the only clothes I have that are acceptable for the cool fall weather are t-shirts, a pair of men's jeans and hiking boots (my farm-working wardrobe) but I get by. I have even come to peace with the food. I must admit I feel quite decadent eating shrimp and smoked salmon and caviar and fake crab and halva everyday. And the mayonnaise! There is something wrong with most the mayonaise in Europe. It's sweet, almost like Miracle Whip, but in Russia they understand mayonnaise and I love mayonnaise.

In a few days I will be leaving Russia. My expensive visa will be up and studies start in Manchester soon. I will be traveling through the capitals of the Baltic states for a week and then flying to the UK. I am both nervous and excited. I have grown a bit weary of homelessness and living out of a bag. Familiar MESPOM faces will be welcome. I am not looking forward to the high cost of living in the UK and I wonder what it will be like to be surrounded by English again. I am excited for a plethora of good shows to attend and access to "ethnic" foods and hippie foods like seitan and tempeh and cheap tofu. I intend to update soon, but don't hold your breath.

I miss and love you all. Please keep in touch.

Polish WWOOFing

Despite not having updated in many travel years (they're sort of like light years) I thought I would write something to let many of you know that I am still alive.

I've been a to too many places in the last few months (Greece, Rome, Prague, Amsterdam, and Krakow) and I am finally staying in one place for a couple of weeks before resuming my nomadic life and heading east (Ukraine) and east (Russia). Perhaps, in my brief period of staying still I will update a bit about the other places I've been but for now - where am I?

I am at a farm in Poland, about an hour and a half outside of Warsaw - more specifically near here. What am I doing here?

I am WWOOFing. Some call it indentured servitude, others serfdom, and, well, some of us call it vacation. Technically it stands for Worldwide Working On Organic Farms and you can find out more about it here. This is the second farm I have visited in Poland.

The first, Michnowiec Eco-Frontiers was in a beautiful place and I could even see Ukraine out of my window. However, despite having solar and wind energy, biological waste management, forests, wetlands, prairies, beaver dams and some very beautiful horses it was not a nice place. Andzrej and Aga were absolute misanthropes and it is beyond me why they would ever agree to let anyone come to their farm. They wouldn't talk to us, they gave us very hard work in hot weather and the only food available was bread, cheese, tomatoes and cucumbers. Look, I know I signed up to work for nothing, and all I really ask for in return is basic human decency. This was not provided at Eco-Frontiers Ranch.

The only other WWOOFer there, Vicky, was from Beijing and this was her first time out of China. She was so unhappy it was painful to watch. I encouraged her to leave - go to Krakow, Prague, a city. After I had only been there 3 days, she left. Although she asked me to come with her I refused. I was unsure if I would stay the entire two weeks I had committed to, but I thought I would stay a bit longer as I had no other plans. However, after Vicky's departure, Andzrej suggested I "find another farm" as "the work they had was for two people." I did not object.

So, I quickly found myself back in Krakow unsure of where I would go next. I ended up enjoying myself immensely in Krakow and stayed for about 6 days (you'll have to forgive me, I cannot remember anything precisely at this point). I was very apprehensive about going to another farm, but I didn't want to write WWOOF off based on one bad experience. When Ewa, from Grzybow Farm (association - Ziarno ) emailed me, asking if I was still coming, I took it as a sign got back on the train/bus.

I'm so glad I did. It is a much better experience here. People are always coming and going, helping flood victims, teaching children English, running workshops on organic farming, baking bread, making cheese, and other kinds of do-goodery that I approve of.

The work is hard and there is a lot of hay involved - turning hay, collecting hay into piles, moving hay bales, feeding hay to goats, putting hay in the cow and horse stables, etc. but I am enjoying myself - doing work that I can see with my hands. There's another WWOOFer here, Hannah, a Californian that is on summer from Columbia and we chat easily while we work. The food is very good, especially the homemade bread and cheese. We eat meals with the family (Ewa and Peter and whichever of the 5 daughters are home) and are always treated kindly. Today, Hannah and I accompanied Peter to Płock, where he delivered bread. We walked around town, got coffee and cake and went to the cathedral.

The family has 2 horses, over 20 goats, including an adorable baby and a scary billy goat, 4 milking cows and 3 calves, and some dogs and cats. Ewa is Polish and does most of the work for the organization. Peter is Swiss and does most of the work on the farm, including making the amazing cheese.

So there you have it. I'm feeling healthy and happy. I'm getting stronger and my hands are getting callused. I am also very very tired, and I'll be back at it at 8 am, so I'm going to bed now. I'll post some photos soon.

I feel so funny.

This has nothing to do with my travels - but, actually, it does. I've certainly met a few Wally Campbell's. One of my favorite passages ever. Is it wrong to hope that we'll get some more Salinger now that he's dead? I know he wouldn't like it - but the rest of us would.

"Oh, I remember...Listen, don't hate me because I can't remember some person immediately. Especially when they look like everybody else and talk and dress and act like everybody else. " Franny made her voice stop. It sounded to her so cavilling and bitchy, and she felt a wave of self-hatred that, quite literally, made her forehead begin to perspire again. But her voice picked up again, in spite of herself. "I don't mean there's anything horrible about him or anything like that. It's just that for four solid years I've kept seeing Wally Campbell's wherever I go. I know when they're going to be charming, I know when they're going to start telling you some really nasty gossip about some girl that lives in your dorm, I know when they're going to ask me what I did over the summer, I know when they're going to pull up a chair and straddle it backward and start bragging in a terribly, terribly quiet voice-or name dropping, in a terribly quiet, casual voice. There's an unwritten law that people in a certain social or financial bracket can name-drop as much as they like as long as they say something terribly disparaging about the person as soon as they've dropped his name-that he's a bastard or a nymphomaniac, or takes dope all the time or something horrible." She broke off again. She was quiet for a moment, turning the ashtray in her fingers and being careful not to look up and see Lane's expression. "I'm sorry," she said. "It isn't just Wally Campbell. I'm just picking on him because you mentioned him. And because he just looks like someone who spent the summer in Italy or someplace."


"He was in France last summer, for your information," Lane stated. "I know what you mean," he added quickly, "but you're being goddam un-"

"All right," Franny said wearily. "France." She took a cigarette out of the pack on the table. "It isn't just Wally. It could be a girl for goodness' sake. I mean, if he were a girl-someone in my dorm, for example-he would have been painting scenery for some stock company all summer. Or bicycled through Wales. Or taken an apartment in New York and worked for a magazine or an advertising company. It's everybody, I mean. Everything everybody does is so-I don't know-not wrong, or even mean, or even stupid necessarily. But just so tiny and meaningless and - sad making. And the worst part is, if you go bohemian or something crazy like that, you're conforming just as much as everybody else, only in a different way." She stopped. She shook her head briefly, her face was quite white and for just a fractional moment she felt her forehead with her hand- less, it seemed, to see if she was perspiring than to check to see, as if she were her own parent, whether she had a fever. "I feel so funny," she said. "I think I'm going crazy. Maybe I'm already crazy."

from Franny and Zooey by J.D. Salinger

Happiest New Year!

I should probably be writing about Barcelona while the thoughts are fresh in my mind. Don’t fret, however, I took notes. “Top Ten in Barcelona,” as requested by Stephen Solomon, will be appearing early in the New Year.

Today, I want to take a few minutes to reflect. 2009 has, without a doubt, been the best year of my life. It wasn’t all great. Terrible, tragic things have happened. I spent most of the year feeling trapped and unhappy. But, surely this year has marked a turning point in my life. Last year, I was working at the library in my hometown, stuck in a relationship that was mediocre at best, beginning to resign myself to the idea that such a life was my fate. Now, I live in Europe, study environmental science and am very rarely bored.

I’m look back at New Year’s 2009 – dancing, playing the jukebox, orange tongues, eating delicious foods, and wizards. I’m remembering my lovely coworkers at North Hill and the friends I made subbing at Main. I loved being a part of that community and the ASCPL will always remain my extended family. I am thankful for the time I was able to spend with my family -the holidays, the dinners; seeing my parents at work. It was nice to be close to home for a while, and I'm thankful for their love and support everyday.

The house at N. Rose was lovely, if occasionally dysfunctional. I loved the people, Brett, Elisa, Jon, and the revolving roommates – Jaimy, Dave, David, Mary. I always enjoyed the company and having someone to share my cooking with. We had a front porch, a backyard and a compost pile. I had an amazing spice rack and a stocked pantry. There was always someone around to watch movies with or chat. We had some great cookouts, a beautiful garden and the friendliest dog and cat you could hope for.

I am thinking about my very best friends, the kind who live in Chicago - old friends and new friends. Most especially, Katharine Fronk, whose emails bring me home and make me laugh, and Vladimir the cat, whose purr and fur I miss often, especially as I’m laying down to bed. I know he’s happy now, tormenting Kat and Tilly with his ridiculous antics and unending ability to shed. There were so many great Chicago trips in 2009. New Year’s, Valentine’s Day, Taste of Chicago, Pitchfork and my farewell cat-delivery visit. Thank you Chicago people. I will see you again someday.

There were the sporadic visits from Stephen that always made the month. Stephen, thank you so much for encouraging me to apply to MESPOM and CEU. You have sincerely and directly changed my life. There was Dave McDowell, always the best company for a long chat about life. Mike Leonhardt, my oldest friend, who has always been there for me. I miss watching the Office with you and eating junk food. We had an amazing day in the woods, getting rained on and acting like children.

At the end of my American 2009 things fell apart. I totaled my car, left my relationship and my house. I did my best to pack for two years, and did an absolutely terrible job. I said my goodbyes as well as I could and hopped on a plane to Budapest.

Now I live a very different life. I am a student again. I don’t understand most of what’s going on around me but I’ve learned to get by. I’ve accomplished my goals of not having a car, of living in a city (with a Metro!) and of traveling. I have friends from every continent. The MESPOM and ENVS people have become my international family. I am so thankful for every one of them and my opportunity to share experiences with them – picnics, Lake Balaton, Szimpla, landfills, drinking in the streets, vodka with salami and all the good times that are sure to come.

I just went on my first trip, alone, to Barcelona and I’ll tell you more about it soon. In short, it was a liberating and confidence-building trip. I am not accustomed to being so optimistic, but life now feels like it holds so much possibility. At home I was feeling old, and resigned. Now I feel young and wild and free. I am learning who I am without the context of the familiar. I am learning that I am capable. I cannot wait for 2010 and the unending potential it holds: Five more months to discover Budapest and the surroundings. Greece in May. Two months open for adventures. Autumn in Manchester, UK.

Friends, wherever you are, put on your New Year’s dress and say hello to a new decade. Here’s to 2010. To knowing better and learning faster. To growth and passion and opportunity. To everyone who made me who I am today and those who are helping to shape my future. I am so grateful!

Egészségedre!

I think I've hit a rough patch

I am having a rough time. Everything always happens all at once.

Today I drank too much coffee and it's given me a headache. Which is worse, the no-coffee headache or the too-much coffee headache?

We have a "take-home final" for Environmental Law and Policy and the basic concept if to posit a solution for Copenhagen in 1500 words. If I were capable of this I wouldn't be in graduate school and if the solution were this simple we'd be living in a zero-carbon world by now. The writing process was painful at first, I'm still not used to being a student again, but in the end I ended up as satisfied as I could expect to be. It's nice to know I can still crank out the pages when necessary. It'd be nicer to feel like it wasn't still bullshit though.

News from home is coming from all directions and it's crazy this week. I wish I were home with the people I loved. I'm glad I'm far away and don't have to deal with the details of the insanity. I want hugs to and from everyone I know. I want a shoulder to rest my head on. I want Thanksgiving dinner with my family- we have the best food. I want the cinnamon rolls. I want the cranberry relish. I want watermelon pickles. I want to see my parents. I want to see my brothers. I want to see my aunt and my cousins. I want to see my grandmother and my uncle even though they can drive me crazy. A Skype call will have to suffice.

I like the people I've met here. Everyone is nice but it's still surface relationships at this point. I miss being in a place where people understand me. I miss some of the things I was most anxious to escape. I was so tired of the blue-collar-pride bullshit at home but I have to admit I miss being around people who earn what they have, whether good or bad. I miss hanging out with a bunch of people who were just as poor and cheap as I am. I miss having a front porch and a back yard. I miss my cat and even Country Dog, despite the fact that she once ate my cell phone. I miss my craft supplies and my trash bags full of yarn.

I hated how the smallness of Akron meant that people knew you even when they didn't know you and defined you based on your past and those around you but I miss people knowing I existed. I miss knowing where I fit in, however awkwardly. I miss going to the Matinee and Annabell's and seeing people I knew, even if they were people I didn't like. I miss Thursdays and dancing to the Smiths. I miss fist-pumps. I miss having company when I come home, everyday.

I don't miss the small town drama. I don't miss Ohio State football. I don't miss being in a dysfunctional relationship or taking care of drunk people all the time. I don't miss the Twilight craze. I don't miss driving every day. I don't miss feeling stuck.

I found cranberries and black beans at store today. Yesterday we went to the Christmas market at lunch and I ate a sausage that I still haven't digested. I also ate an amazing pastry thing that was shaped like a spiral. I didn't see the cheap yarn Stephen told me about but I'll look harder next time. Then I will make myself a hat and a scarf. The hat will have ear-flaps and a pom-pom and I will feel better when my hands are busy and productive.

Tonight, I'm going to drink some wine.

Send me warm thoughts. Or just send positive thoughts out into the universe and even if they don't make it this far - I hope they'll be intercepted by people who need them.

Food and dancing and death

I haven't updated forever. I know and I'm sorry - although I doubt manyone has noticed. I can't believe how quickly time is flying by. Christmas is coming up fast and it feels like I just got here. On the other hand, when I realize I'll still be here (here = Europe) NEXT Christmas that freaks me out a little bit. Mostly I try not to think too far into the future. So, who wants to come visit me?

Things are going well. Hungarian life has become normal life. I still don't know many words but I've gotten used to it and I've figured out some important things like which kind of yogurt I prefer (it says Kefir, but it's not Kefir, it's regular plain ol' yogurt so you can eat it with a curry or you can eat with muesli, which is what Hungarians eat because they don't have granola) and NOT to buy generic ketchup (because it tastes like duck sauce). I spend too much time doing errands - walking, and carrying. Sometimes I wish I could just get in the Subaru and run to the Acme.

I've also fallen in love with two separate cheese products:

Túró Rudi - it's cheese covered in dark chocolate. Apparently it is "typical Hungarian" and I really love them. When I first got here, my Hungarian classmate Eva had us try them. She said most people who aren't Hungarian don't like them. And she was right, I don't like them. I LOVE them and I keep them in my fridge at all times.

Túrós táska - it literally means "cottage cheese backpack." My friend Anton calls them "cheese buns" and I like that too. I couldn't find a good English language description online but basically it's a pastry filled with cheese and a lot of times there's a raisin inside. I imagine the raisin is for good luck but I have to imagine explanations for lots of things these days. Maybe they put a raisin in there in hopes that I'll choke on it. OOH. And there's powdered sugar on top! They're best when they're hot and I usually buy myself one as a present when I've been doing errands for hours and I'm tired and think I deserve a treat.

I think it goes without saying at this point, but my appetite has come back! However, when it comes to cooking I'm a bit uninspired. I don't know where my creativity went but I mostly just cook curries. This is fine with me, but I know I used to make a lot of other things - what were they?

Enough about food.

Last night I went to the Opera House for the first time. It was nice. 11 of us went and tickets were only 400 forints (that's about $2.5). Granted, they were so cheap because we were in the second balcony and way to the the right and you couldn't really see that well but it was totally worth it. We saw a ballet called "The Karamozov's" based on The Brothers Karamazov by Fyodor Dostoevsky. I read all of this book (except the trial) earlier this year and was actually inspired to FINISH it by the existence of my ballet ticket. I was curious to see how anyone could make a ballet from a 1000 page book as dense and philosophical as this one and was actually surprised at how well they pulled it off.

In short - the book was reduced to the lover's quarrels between Dmitri and Fyodor over Grushenka and Dmitri and Ivan over Katya. Alyosha was there too- trying to be reasonable. Smerdyakov was nowhere to be found, nor was the envelope. Ivan was tormented by demons that acted a lot like zombies. The "Grand Inquisitor" scene was also included, and a narrator said some things but I couldn't understand since I don't speak Hungarian. My friend JM, who does speak Hungarian, told me two very funny things as this was happening:

"I can't really understand, they're speaking in Shakespearean Hungarian"

and

"They keep saying 'free, free, free'"

Also, the music was totally ripped off from people like Mussorgsky and Wagner. The ending was all done to the last movement "Dreams of a Witch's Sabbath" of Berlioz's Symphonie Fantastique. I love that movement with the Dies Irae, and of course, the kick-ass bassoon part. I wasn't even watching the dancing at this point. All in all - good times.

Today, I walked to a part of town I've never been, which is something I try to do, especially on the weekends. Also, I'm trying to get outside as much as possible before the weather gets any colder. I went to the Kerepesi Cemetery and walked around there for a couple of hours alone. It was beautiful and old and so, so quiet. All I could hear was the sound of my feet crunching on leaves and the sound of birds. I could hear birds! I even saw a squirrel and it was reddish and had funny ear-tufts. Silly Hungarian squirrels. The weather was overcast and chilly. It was the perfect day to explore a cemetery.



I had a really nice time - it was so peaceful. I did my best to be reverent. Many stones were grown over with ivy and the dates has faded from the stone. However, many other stones, equally as old, were well-cared for and had flowers laid on them. I thought of when my mother and I went to all these old family cemeteries around Columbus to see where some relatives are buried. I thought about how nice it would be to have people visit your grave a hundred years after you died and I thought about how I wouldn't mind if mine grew over with ivy either. I thought about how cool the big sculptures of the graves were and I wanted one (a naked lady please) for a minute but then I decided that I'd rather just be cremated or buried in one of those natural burial sites where you're allowed to decompose (there it is, in writing - just in case).

I guess I spent a fair amount of time being morbid but that's bound to happen when you spend your Saturday afternoon alone in a giant Hungarian cemetery.

Now my feet are tired and my eyes won't quite focus so I'll go home now and read and eat and be just as boring as I was in Ohio and just a little bit more lonely.